After losing her council tenancy, Sandy’s life became chaotic with homelessness and addiction. Living in hostels and sometimes on the streets, she faced constant challenges with safety and mental health. Her journey took a positive turn when she found support from St Mungo’s. This is her story.
Before St Mungo’s, life was chaotic because I was drinking and using drugs. I couldn’t go to appointments, I couldn’t meet people, I felt completely isolated in all my chaos and it affected my mental health. When I lost my council tenancy, I went into the hostel system, which felt like being homeless and sleeping rough because the hostels are really rough and it didn’t help with my addiction — it just spiralled out of control. As a woman, I felt more unsafe in the hostels because you meet other people that are using as well. There’s lots of rows and fights and trying to keep yourself apart from that is really hard. It’s just a dangerous situation. I try not to get involved.
I’ve slept rough on the street too. When I moved in with my ex-partner, he was violent. When he got drunk and out of control, he’d throw me out and I’d be on the street all night, trying to find somewhere safe to sleep without getting attacked. When it was cold, it was really horrible. I tried to find a blanket, maybe a sleeping bag and use that to cover me up overnight. I have mental health issues so I’m not allowed to be on the street —they have to house me somewhere. So I ended up back in the hostel system for a long time. I was still with my partner then, so I’d go in and out, sometimes for just a night and this happened loads of times over ten years.
Then I was introduced to St Mungo’s in 2014. I was in a hostel when they came to me and said, “Can we help you?” I needed help, so they supported me. The only time I really wanted to get better was recently when I went into rehab. Because I had engaged with support before, I was able to get into rehab. When I got clean this year in May, things got a lot better.
I’ve been reflecting on what I’ve been through every day now. It feels good. I’ve come out of those bad situations and even though I’m not in an ideal place — I’m in a hotel at the minute and don’t like it much — but I say to myself, as long as I get my head on that pillow, I’m clean and sober, just for today. That’s another day I can add to my sobriety. If I could give advice to my younger self, I’d say don’t drink or do drugs, don’t get into violent relationships, stay clean and your life will get a lot better. You just have to work with the system to reach your goal, which is a tenancy and maintaining it.
Right now, I’m in groups and activities to keep myself busy. I like hearing other people’s stories — it helps me think about where I’ve come from. I’m doing an IT course and have just completed two modules. Even though I’m a slow starter, I’m learning and at my age, it’s pretty good. I might start a bakery or flower arrangement course on Fridays to fill my week and I’m looking forward to that. There’s also a peer mentoring course I want to do so I can be a mentor to other addicts. It’s important to me because it’s giving something back; I can only keep what I’ve been freely given. So if I can help someone else, it makes us both feel good.
St Mungo’s has supported me with lots of things like getting me to appointments and helping with my letters. If I’m having a bad day, I can phone them and they’ll support me, maybe take me for coffee to chat and see what’s going on with me. Last Christmas, they bought me a Christmas tree, so I could feel festive in the flat. It’s not all about council or benefits — they take us out, we come together as a community and we all go for Christmas dinner, which is nice.
I get different workers over time but I’m never left without support. I’ve worked with Aly for five or six years. A couple of years ago when I lost my flat, I got cuckooed by drug dealers and I didn’t know where else to turn. I phoned Aly and they sorted it all out for me and put me in a safe house. I know if I’m ever in trouble, they’re there. Sometimes I just call to chat and they always ask how I’m doing.
I’m looking forward to getting a new flat and mentoring people, then take it from there. Getting my head on the pillow clean and sober tonight means I’ll be okay for tomorrow. I’m looking forward to Christmas, but I don’t know where I’ll be.
To those who donate, thank you. You give us hope and courage to go on. If it weren’t for St Mungo’s, I don’t know where I’d be, so that fiver will go a long way.